What do you do when it feels so dark?

The last two weeks, I was in Bali, deepening my Kundalini yoga practice. There was something so enchanting about practicing to a view and sounds of verdant nature and witnessing the skies lighting up from pre-dawn hours.

I could wax lyrical about the incredible grace I experienced.

The truth is, I was also tending to the shadows that unceremonially surfaced from crevices tucked away from plain sight.

To say the least, January was a month of finding my feet after the end of a monumental year that just passed. Soulful questions led to uncomfortable, heartfelt answers.

I shed tears I never thought I had. I slept too much. My heart felt tender and raw. I was struggling to keep my head above stormy waters.

In the end, what saw me through the dark seas was yoga. A hell lot of Kundalini yoga.

During those weeks where I felt absolutely shattered, I poured myself into kriyas, or a themed set of exercises, to unearth and release pent-up emotions buried so deep within. I dug deep to strengthen and ground my entire being.

The Kundalini yoga technology of simultaneously using asana, pranayama, mantra and mudra to direct prana to where it should go very swiftly centered and empowered me.

I could neither rush time nor my healing, but the yoga practice that both fortifies and nourishes me, and fills my belly with fire, allows me to see the silver lining in the gray clouds.

The sense of renewal was so palpable I showed up for my mat, and ultimately for myself, despite the aches that were gnawing away at every part of me.

My dedicated [Kundalini] yoga practice gave me concrete tools to sit with the disquiet, to make peace with uncertainties.

If change is the only constant, then embracing the unknown is other surety.

In that vastness, I trusted that all that didn’t serve my highest good was being shown out of my life.

As I pick up the fragments and reshape the new me, I am aware hailstones and debilitating storms are mere reflections of the seasons and cycles of life.

Buds will always blossom and bloom again.

How we navigate wintry weather to welcome spring makes all the difference.

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